Under Pants

Yes.  The Phillies got Under Pants Hunter Pence.  After watching a rare game where the Phils actually score more than two runs, I find myself feeling slightly bittersweet over this mid-season trade.

I’m a big Dom Brown fan.

He’s young, he tall and lanky, and he’s humble.

Also, have you ever seen those pictures where people take the eyes and flip them upside down, making them look super freaky?  

Yeah, Dom Brown looks like that.

Something about his eyes just conveys an all-around “Huuhhh?” feeling.

Yeah he wasn’t the best player.

Yeah sometimes I found myself cursing at the TV screen when he didn’t make a catch.

But hey man, just because my mom yells at me when I don’t clean my room before driving back to Rutgers doesn’t me she doesn’t care about me.

Same goes for Dom Brown.  I’m gonna miss you playing the outfield every day.

Onto Pence-sylvania.

During the game broadcast, they switched to footage of Hunter Pence being taken out of the game at the Astros-Brewers game.  He hustled off the field, waving to players he passed.  In the dugout, he shared a few hugs.  And then he was seen visibly crying.


Sometimes I wish players got the chance to tell the world how they truly feel about being traded.  I’d take it as an immediate insult.  In Pence’s case, I’d have to be reminded multiple times that the Astros are receiving 4 players for me.

Think about it.  They are saying one person, Hunter Pence, equals four humans.  Now I’m no mathematician, but 1 does NOT equal 4.  But its the MLB.  Athletes aren’t mathematicians either.

I’d hate to be one of those 4 players being equated to one-fourth of a human.  But no big deal.

Also if I was Hunter Pence, I’d only need to be reminded once that I’m going to the team with the best record in baseball.  Big Deal.


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